Planning an authentic wedding

We’re so lucky to speak to so many couples at the start of their wedding planning journey and one thing shines through in every conversation we have: authenticity. Knowing that your wedding will be true to you is really important to our couples and of course, to us. Truly authentic weddings are what we so proudly produce time and time again.

We both had our own very authentic weddings, handmade and built by ourselves – in some ways literally by hand. I still feel such warmth thinking about how true to us our wedding was. If I planned it now with everything I know and the inspiration surrounding me, I think it would be a real struggle to keep it authentic.

I believe that having an authentic wedding is the key to having the best day of your life. Having elements that aren’t you, perhaps for someone or something else will literally jar against you. They will disrupt you and your energy on the day – and there’s no time for that on your one and only wedding day! The day should feel like a huge hug.

A hand drawn sign – by me! I’d never do that now because of instagram. I’d probably feel pressure to have it made, but I adored it on the day.

Your team should just ‘get’ you. It should be no effort to say what you want and need. This is me and Shiv, who married Will in 2019.

So how do you ensure your wedding is authentically you?

The first step, right at the start of planning, before you speak to anyone is to have some time together to think about what you’d like your wedding to be like and what you can afford to spend / would like to spend. We love to learn this on our first call with couples and it’s something we revisit throughout the planning process as a step towards ensuring we’re doing the right thing for them throughout, sometimes reminding them of what they wanted, when things were simple!

Ask yourself questions like; where the wedding would be? Would people stay at the venue, or nearby? What might it look like (views and setting, flowers and décor)? How will the day feel (calm and relaxed or more formal and ordered)? Would we have any music playing? What would the food be like? Are there any things we’ve always wanted to have/do? Are there any other events we’d like to have with our guests? What would we feel comfortable spending overall?

It’s natural that things will change as you plan and learn more about the wedding, developing your ideas and seeking more inspiration. But it’s important to have this grounding to come back to and keep things on the right track perhaps when new ideas come along, you have other external influences or you fall in love with things that are over budget!

This initial thinking is also helpful when you start to speak to suppliers or wedding planners. It’s important to tell suppliers what you really want, so you can quite quickly work out which suppliers are going to be able to align with this. It doesn’t sound diva-ish and it helps you find the right people for you. It’s tempting and easy to take the route of lower cost options. While not always the rule, it’s well worth spending a bit more to have a team that truly understand your vision and will whole-heartedly deliver it. Wedding planning is a long process, you don’t want any confrontations, misunderstandings or worst of all to feel uncomfy on your wedding day and this really is key to avoiding that.

Thanks to Instagram and Pinterest, the way a wedding looks gets more coverage than the event itself! Decor is where we most commonly have to pull back the deviation from the authentic couple, usually caused by overwhelm of ideas and inspo. We often see couples pulling together a real miss-match of images and styles, that if produced would be, well funny looking (!), wildly over budget and potentially not what the couple would really like when they are in the reality of their wedding. Our goal is to have couples in absolute awe of their day, so this is where we find a thread and produce a Style Guide to bring things together, on or near to budget and add a touch of them. We make recommendations based on experience and unique ideas just for them and their wedding.

If you don’t have a wedding planner, a good florist will produce a mood board and guidelines that show the colours and themes through the day, which you can then hinge your other creative elements and ideas on.

Oh and one more thing, if it’s not ‘on trend’ or on Instagram but it’s a bit of you – just do it! You’ll never regret it!

Finally, plan your day right. Get the timings in order so you’re not feeling rushed by anyone and have the right time in the right places. For example, a long aperitivo is nice so you can have some family photos and still have lots of time to enjoy your guests. At an Italian wedding there’s always plenty of food and drink for this stage of the day (and the rest!). You probably won’t do many couples shots at this stage because (hopefully) the sun will be too bright. You’ll want to consider sneaking off just before sunset for these. Your photographer should advise this and if you have a planner they should consider this. It can often clash with when the speeches might be, so it’s another key consideration. You’ll get the best shots of the day while not missing anything important!

So there’s just a few ways to ensure your wedding is the two of you and something you’ll not only remember for ever but be able to feel so warmly, with no regrets, for the rest of your lives together.